Daniel A. Selwa, II, Attorney At Law, LLC

So this is how democracy dies… with weird, Jenga-like pieces.

The gloves are well and truly off now, kids.

Given our response to COVID, are we really surprised that caring about someone else’s health is being criminalized?

Corporations are willing to relocate based on medical service access? Maybe they actually are people.

* Man, that guy could blow — trees: Famous saxophonist’s son in hot water after naming a weed brand after his father. [WMGK]

* “What’s really in name? Oh, that’s what it means! Yeah, let’s change that before we get sued.” The US Interior after doing quick Google searches of monument names, probably. [The Guardian]

* Another same-sex First Amendment case will be before the Supreme Court soon. You ever feel like you’re caught in a loop? [WSJ]

* South Carolina appeals court upholds lower court ruling that basically says, “You can’t just overrule Roe, dude.” Remember when 50ish years of precedent meant something? [Sun Herald]

* Oklahoma’s AG will be figuring out if time-honored literary classics like Lord of the Flies and Of Mice and Men are obscene. Trust, students see way worse content on Twitter. [Read Frontier]

* Antitrust litigation against Facebook has been dismissed. Maybe the court thought that MySpace was a viable competitor… [Wall Street Journal]

* Be sure to check out the Anti-Defamation League’s annual Supreme Court review. [ADL]

* A South Carolina lawyer has been suspended from practice for incendiary Facebook posts he made about George Floyd. [New York Post]

* A Trump attorney claimed yesterday that the Manhattan DA is investigating the Trump Organization for charges relating to company perks. [Hill]

* E-cigarette company Juul has paid $40 million to settle a lawsuit alleging it improperly advertised its products to teens. That’s a lot of money that went up in smoke… [CNN]

* An association of insurance agents is suing Allstate for breach of contract. Hope the company is in good hands… [Insurance Business]

* A California ethics advisory opinion has stressed that lawyers cannot ignore another attorney’s mental impairment. [Bloomberg Law]

* Amazon is the subject of five lawsuits claiming discrimination and retaliation in the workplace. [Forbes]

* Donald Trump was not happy about news that the New York Attorney General has opened up a criminal probe into his business affairs. [Politico]

* A class-action lawsuit has been filed against a South Carolina paper mill over a “rotten egg” smell. Hope they’re sure the smell is coming from the mill… [NBC News]

* A lawsuit alleging that Disney infringed on copyrights when it rebooted “Muppet Babies” has been dismissed. Guess Disney doesn’t have to open its Miss Piggy bank and the lawsuit is now Gonzo… [Hollywood Reporter]

* The Supreme Court sided with Facebook in a recent case alleging that unwanted text messages sent by the social media platform violated federal law. [Hill]

* A contempt conviction has been upheld against a lawyer who allegedly streamed a hearing live on Facebook. [Macomb Daily]

* Check out this feature on Kim Kardashian’s divorce lawyer. [New York Times]

* A class action alleging that a telemarketing company overcharged clients has settled for millions of dollars. [Oregonian]

* Thousands of government workers in New York may be unable to smoke recreational marijuana under a proposed law. Thank you for your service… [Daily News]

* A class action has been filed against Allstate for allegedly using unqualified expert witnesses to drive up legal costs. Hope the company is in good hands… [Texas Lawyer]

* A Tennessee lawyer has had his law license suspended for allegedly advising someone on how to kill another and make it look like self defense. [New York Post]

* A South Carolina law firm that purportedly assisted in a scheme to defraud retirees and others has been ordered to pay restitution. [Post and Courier]

* Three Breonna Taylor grand jurors are seeking to impeach the Attorney General of Kentucky. [CNN]

* Since Above the Law hasn’t had a “Lawyerly Lairs” segment in a while, just wanted to relate that Gibson Dunn’s Randy Mastro just listed his Upper East Side pad for a hefty sum. [Real Deal]

If you want to join the girlcott, all you have to do is commit to visiting South Carolina sometime in 2021 (whenever it is safe, pandemic-wise) and to spending some money there, if and only if Jaime Harrison wins the Senate seat.

* Lady Gaga’s father has joined a lawsuit seeking to end New York City’s indoor dining ban. Now that litigation is on “the edge of glory.” [Fox Business]

* A lawyer for the accused Kenosha shooter has resigned his position from a defense fund that has raised around $700,000 for the defense team. [Yahoo News]

* A Senior District Attorney in the Brooklyn DA’s office was killed by a bus while riding her bike yesterday. Sending our deepest sympathies to the family of the deceased. [New York Post]

* A South Carolina attorney has been disbarred after taking a plea on an indecent exposure charge. [NBC News]

* A Texas Supreme Court decision may open the door to service of process through email or social media accounts. Think of all the filters that can be used when serving process through insta… [KSAT.com]

* The Department of Justice has backed a lawsuit against Hawaii over the state’s mandatory quarantine for out-of-state travelers. Maybe DOJ lawyers just really want to visit the Aloha state… [Fox News]

* A South Carolina lawyer has been disbarred for making numerous false and misleading statements on her bar application. [Bloomberg Law]

* A lawyer who walked out on a client during settlement negotiations is on the hook for a $300,000 malpractice verdict. [Legal Newswire]

* The Second Circuit expressed bewilderment while considering the bail request of two lawyers charged with firebombing an NYPD police vehicle during protests last month. [Law360]

* Bayer has agreed to pay $10 billion into a settlement fund to resolve thousands of lawsuits related to the weedkiller Roundup. And Bayer was able to settle the lawsuits without having to pay two plaintiffs’ lawyers a $200 million “consultation” fee. [NBC News]

* Representatives of Barack Obama have sent a cease and desist letter to a Republican Super PAC for using snippets from Obama’s audio books. But soundboarding is so much fun! [CNN]

* A Texas judge is blaming low blood sugar on a tirade that he leveled against a criminal defense lawyer. [Texas Lawyer]

* A law firm accountant is facing grand theft and attempted murder charges for a rampage she committed against coworkers earlier this year. [Gainesville Sun]

* South Carolina is facing litigation over a law that bans teachers from discussing LGBTQ issues in the classroom. [Guardian]

* An attorney who gave up the practice of law five decades ago has decided to reinstate his law license at the age of 82. It’s never to late to resume the practice of law. [ABA Journal]

Perhaps this was ill-advised.

* Law schools in North and South Carolina have canceled classes for the foreseeable future so that students, faculty, and staff can evacuate the area and hunker down before Hurricane Florence arrives. Please be careful and stay safe, everyone. [Law.com]

* President Trump is eager to choose Emmet Flood to succeed Don McGahn as the next White House counsel. Ty Cobb, one of Trump’s former lawyers, is in Flood’s camp because he’s “battled investigations from the White House before—[and] that’s what will be coming.” [Wall Street Journal]

* Earlier this week, Bob Woodward said that former Trump attorney John Dowd told the president he couldn’t testify in the Russia investigation because he’s “disabled” and “can’t tell the truth.” That sounds just about right. [People]

* The University of California Berkeley School of Law may soon be doing away with almost all references to John Henry Boalt thanks to his racist views. Public comment on the issue will close on Halloween, and then Dean Erwin Chemerinsky may formally apply to dename Boalt Hall. Let’s see what happens with this one. [ABA Journal]

* “This is clear interference with an ongoing criminal investigation.” Representatives from the New York state tax department reportedly met with Michael Cohen’s attorney yesterday over the objections of Southern District of New York. [CNN]

* A family of conspiracy theorists: Donald Trump Jr. says he’s not worried about going to jail as a result of Robert Mueller’s Russia probe, but “[t]hat doesn’t mean they won’t try to create something” that could put him in jail. [USA Today]

A tale of two law schools.

South Carolina will drop murder charges.

You debase yourselves if you let this man walk free.

* Does your schedule already include three summer lunches this week? Here’s how to avoid packing on the pounds. [Corporette]

* Judicial overload in federal courts in South Carolina is getting out of hand. [Greenville Online]

* A look at how the Jones Day brand might be hurting. [Law and More]

* Taking the abstraction out of the homelessness problem. [Guile is Good]

* That New York Times article about Valpo Law School is creating a lot of buzz. [TaxProf Blog]

* An in-depth look at the sad story of Biglaw partners who were de-equitized. [Law360]

We don’t beat black children to knock some sense into them, we beat black children to knock the hope out of them.