Arnold & Porter Kaye Scholer LLP

The judge denied the defense's request for no jail time.

His lawyers argue he's been punished enough.

* “I’d like to see in the Constitution a statement that men and women are people of equal citizenship stature. I’d like to see an equal rights amendment in our Constitution.” Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg is all in favor of amending the Constitution to benefit women. Are you? [Washington Post]

* Kashyap Patel, the “primary author” of the House Intelligence Committee’s secret memo, is no stranger to controversy. You may remember when he dropped out of this bachelor auction due to an issue with his license to practice or from this “Order on Ineptitude” after he was berated by a federal judge. [New York Times]

* Duke Law has a brand new dean, and she’ll be starting her job come July 1. Congratulations to Kerry Abrams — “one of the brightest stars in legal education” — on becoming one of the handful of women to lead one of America’s top law schools. [Duke Today]

* The DOJ wants former Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort’s suit against special counsel Robert Mueller and Deputy AG Rod Rosenstein to be tossed, arguing that its only purpose is to “interfere with [his] ongoing criminal prosecution.” Yep, that was the whole point. [CNN]

* Ouch! One Am Law 100 Firm is experiencing that awkward moment when management decides to completely scrub the name of the firm’s major merger partner from all of its branding, just one year after the combination was consummated. [American Lawyer]

The country's most famous practicing lawyer tells the tale of how he left Cravath to launch his own firm.

* According to Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Chuck Grassley, it’s highly likely that we’ll have another Supreme Court vacancy this summer. Word on the street is that a justice is thinking about retiring, and all eyes are on Justice Kennedy, the high court’s swing vote. Hmm, we thought we’d already put this rumor to bed. [The Hill]

* After years of accepting incoming students with questionable academic qualifications followed by unsurprisingly dismal bar exam results, another law school will be closing soon. We all knew it would happen eventually, but it was just a matter of which one it would be. We’ll have much more on this later today. [Orange County Business Journal]

* Kerrie Campbell, the Chadbourne & Parke partner who filed a $100 million gender discrimination suit against her firm, will learn later this morning whether she’s been ousted from the Chadbourne partnership. Campbell, who is out on medical leave, says her removal from the partnership would be financially ruinous. [Am Law Daily]

* Former pharma bro Martin Shkreli and his former attorney, former Kaye Scholer partner Evan Greebel, will have separate trials this summer thanks to this ruling. After all, Greebel turned on his former client months ago, and his lawyers planned to “assert a defense that [would] be an ‘echo chamber’ for the prosecution.” [WSJ Law Blog]

* When Big Weed meets Biglaw: In honor of 4/20, the mainstream media has finally caught on and realized that marijuana law is an up-and-coming practice area. This article focuses on some of the well-known law firms that have adopted marijuana practices, like Thompson Coburn, Fox Rothschild, and Much Shelist. [Chicago Tribune]

Greebel's defense will consist of throwing Shkreli under the bus.

A leading litigation shop in New York joins forces with one of Washington's most storied firms.

Which law firms did the best in this year's rankings?

Finally! What in the world took this firm so long to announce raises?

Both of these firms' financials suffered in 2015.

These are the firms that work to allow distressed corporations a fresh start.

* Because he’d like to stop “freeriding on the services of Bryan Cave,” Stephen DiCarmine, Dewey & LeBoeuf’s former executive director, told a judge that he’d like to dump Austin Campriello as his lawyer and represent himself in the retrial of his criminal case. DiCarmine, a current textile design student, was warned that this likely wasn’t a very wise choice on his part. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Kaye Scholer’s managing partner “wouldn’t comment on any speculation or rumor,” but word on the street is that his firm and Arnold & Porter may potentially be discussing a possible merger. Information related to this merger is really just a game of Biglaw telephone at this point. Let us know if you have any credible details. [Big Law Business]

* This seems like the plotline of a reality TV series: A trial date has been set for one of the three Trump University lawsuits, and if all goes according to plan for likely Republican nominee Donald Trump, it looks like we may have a president-elect taking the witness stand to testify about allegations related to fraud before his inauguration. [CBS News]

* Just in time for law school commencement ceremonies, the Bureau of Labor Statistics has some depressing news about employment statistics. In April, the legal services sector lost 1,500 jobs. Thus far, the only month in 2016 when jobs were added in the legal services sector was March. Well… this really isn’t very encouraging. [Am Law Daily]

* “It’s been one step forward, two steps back since [2009].” The job market for law school grads is still challenging, but due to the fact that class sizes are smaller now, job prospects may seem a bit brighter for some. Are things really looking up? This John Marshall Law grad — with a job! — thinks things are going to be fine. [Chicago Tribune]

Biglaw partner Evan Greebel is in Biglaw no more.

What must you know about Evan Greebel, and the case against him, to be an up-to-date guest at your next holiday cocktail hour?

* Both Kaye Scholer partner Evan Greebel (formerly of Katten Muchin) and Turing Pharmaceuticals CEO Martin Shkreli pleaded not guilty to securities fraud charges. Now, the world is left to weep because Skhreli’s Wu-Tang album wasn’t seized. [Reuters]

* “You are not an American because you got sworn in on a Koran.” The Hate Crimes Unit of the New York Police Department is investigating a series of threatening calls made to Judge Carolyn Walker-Diallo, Brooklyn’s first Muslim judge. [WSJ Law Blog]

* David Lola, the contract attorney who sued Skadden and Tower Legal for overtime pay with claims he wasn’t practicing law, settled his claims for $75,000. But now we don’t know if doc reviewers are entitled to overtime pay. 🙁 [Big Law Business / Bloomberg]

* Slater & Gordon, the world’s first publicly traded law firm, continues to watch as its stock price tumbles. The firm’s shares are now worth A$0.89 after it decided to pull its earnings guidance, and they’ve lost 90 percent of their value since April. [The Guardian]

* That’s not how you’re supposed to examine briefs: A Maryland court commissioner was charged with visual surveillance with prurient intent and misconduct in office after allegedly using his cellphone to take an upskirt photo of a courthouse employee. [AP]

A Biglaw partner was arrested this morning!

* Cocaine-swiping judge out on work release. [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette]

* Autozone settles $185 million suit over firing a pregnant worker. [Jezebel]

* Once Donald Trump shuts up about illegal immigrants, maybe the adults in the room can start talking about the horrific conditions facing legal migrants, specifically those with H-2 visas. [BuzzFeed News]

* It sounds like this guy deserved more than a 30-month license suspension. [Legal Profession Blog]

* Things you can’t tell your employees: that they look “quite f**kable.” [Legal Cheek]

* A new report focuses on disabilities in the legal profession. [BWB Solutions]

* If you write off “trigger warnings” as an assault on academic freedom, you might be missing the point. [TaxProf Blog]

* More on why a ban on T-14 hires is stupid. [Break Into Biglaw]

* Kaye Scholer’s Michael Solow discusses his experiences with the real-life Professor Kingsfield. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg BNA]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dmtJ3bC0INo

* 50 Cent has declared bankruptcy. Forthwith, he shall be known as “The Secured Creditors’ Half-Dollar.” [Business Insider]

* Nina Totenberg talked with Justice Ginsburg and learned the reason the so-called liberal wing of the Court wrote so few separate opinions: they have agreed to speak with one voice as much as possible. As Justice Ginsburg put it, “If you want to make sure you’re read, you do it together, and you do it short.” [NPR]

* Are you licensed in Texas? Frequent contributor Dan Hull of Hull McGuire is looking for local counsel. [What About Clients?]

* Academics are planning to hold onto their jobs past retirement age because you can take their jobs from their cold, dead, tenured hands. [TaxProf Blog]

* How are you using LinkedIn? Because if you use it only as a connections catalog, you’re missing out on an opportunity to publicize your practice. [Law and More]

* The opposite of saved by the bell: man free on bond sent to jail cell when fire alarm disrupts hearing. Then the judge leaves the building, stranding the guy in a cell. [Times-Picayune]

* Richard Hsu chats with author Brad Meltzer about his new book and weathering the rejection he experienced over his first novel. And stay tuned, because there’s more Richard Hsu coming up later. [Hsu Untied]

* Kaye Scholer’s Managing Partner Michael Solow talks about the firm’s new digs at 250 West 55th Street. [Big Law Business / Bloomberg BNA]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKfjssLrOm0

* Fun fact: Seattle Seahawks QB Russell Wilson’s uncle is the managing principal of of Beverage & Diamond’s D.C. office. Thanks to a gentlemen’s bet, because Wilson’s team lost the Super Bowl, his uncle will have to wear a Gronk or Tom Brady jersey. Ouch. [Legal Times]

* One of the homeless dogs who played in Animal Planet’s 11th annual Puppy Bowl was adopted by Bob Bernstein, a former partner at Kaye Scholer. The adorable Great Pyrenees-mix now leads a life of privilege, as any Biglaw pet should. [New York Post]

* We know all about the former law school dean who was recently arrested on some pretty salacious charges. We’ll have more on this later today. [Dallas Morning News]

* The interim dean of religiously affiliated Liberty Law thinks challenges to the school’s heteronormative honor code are a “concern for the future” — especially since a Canadian Christian law school is under fire for a similar code. [Deseret News]

* It’s not just law schools in the United States that are feeling the pinch of a fewer applicants amid a pathetic legal job market. Japan’s legal education system is also struggling, and some law schools may merge in order to survive. [Japan Times]

* Prosecutors say formal charges won’t be filed in George Zimmerman’s latest aggravated assault case because his current girlfriend recanted her claims, just like his ex did. His lawyer was wrong — his client does have luck with the ladies. [CNN]

Bonus reports from several different law firms -- mostly good news.