Katten Muchin Rosenman LLP

The Feds, much like Wu-Tang, are nothing to mess with.

Associates that've been billing their butts off are being rewarded.

COVID strikes at Biglaw firm.

Cha-ching!

It's a lot of money if you bill a lot.

What a great way to say thank you to associates -- cold, hard cash!

Exciting news!

The judge denied the defense's request for no jail time.

Will associates get a raise? Depends on what their hours look like.

Payday lender feels they were taken advantage of.

Greebel's defense will consist of throwing Shkreli under the bus.

* Judge Posner rules that you can’t yell “fire” on a crowded Internet. [ABA Journal]

* Want a sneak peek at Am Law 100/200 financial results? Spoiler: top firms make a lot of money. [ALM Staff]

* Apparently it’s financially tenuous to leave Biglaw. Who knew walking away from $200K+ could put a crimp in your plans? [Am Law Daily]

* Michael Cohen is spinning in the wind after his contradictory secret peace plan claims fall apart. [Business Insider]

* Dechert has jumped into Philadelphia’s looming sanctuary city fight and Hogan Lovells may not be far behind. [Legal Intelligencer]

* The harassment claims against Uber have in-house counsel under fire.
[National Law Journal]

* Human boil Martin Shkreli and Evan Greebel, his former attorney from Katten, are seeking separate trials. [Law360]

* In the event that the election ends in a deadlock, will the Supreme Court be able to resolve the dispute even though the highest court in the land is currently split 4-4 down ideological lines? No one knows, and that’s “[one] hell of a scary thought.” Not to worry, because there’s a “low probability” that the Supreme Court would have to decide the winner of the 2016 election — “[b]ut if it does happen, it surely won’t be good.” How comforting! [POLITICO]

* The Supreme Court refused to step into a legal battle between the Ohio Democratic Party and the Trump campaign over voter harassment with no dissents, save for a comment from Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, who noted that because she was “mindful” of existing Ohio law prohibiting voter intimidation, she was denying the request. Thanks to the Notorious RBG for the reminder not to participate in illegal activities. [Slate]

* Martin Shkreli thinks he’s going to be able to clear his name by forcing Katten Muchin to turn over three years’ worth of documents from the time the firm represented him, with his new attorneys claiming he acted in good faith because he “sought and received his lawyers’ advice and he followed it.” The firm isn’t thrilled about the prospect of having to hand over hundreds of thousands of pages of documents. [Big Law Business]

* The institution formerly known as the South Texas College of Law has unveiled yet another new name after being enjoined from using the name Houston College of Law. The school will now be known as the South Texas College of Law Houston. Your tuition dollars at work: It seems like the school wasted an incredible amount of money to come up with a name substantially similar to its original name. Congrats? [Houston Chronicle]

* The Law School Admission Council recently published a report on the different methods test-takers used to prepare for the LSAT, and it seems that the biggest ground-breaking takeaway from the data is that those who actually studied scored much better on the exam than those who did not. In addition, those who used official LSAC materials and commercial preparation courses fared better than self-studiers. [U.S. News]

* Is there a constitutional right to smoke weed? This defendant says he was prescribed medical marijuana to help him kick an opioid addiction, and his bail conditions must be revised to allow him to keep smoking it, lest his Sixth Amendment right to participate fully in his own defense be impaired. How high were the Katten Muchin lawyers who thought up this creative defense? [Reuters]

* Baker Donelson plans to merge with Ober Kaler to create one of the largest Biglaw firms in the country. Effective January 1, the firm will have more than 800 attorneys, and one of the largest health law practices in America. The $400+ million in revenue expected to be brought in by the merger isn’t too shabby, either. [Big Law Business]

* “[N]o one is dragging their feet here. The Justice Department is committed to working with the FBI to move the case forward.” AG Loretta Lynch and Deputy AG Sally Yates are trying to get FBI Director James Comey to wrap up his renewed interest in the Hillary Clinton email probe as quickly as possible before the election next week. [Politico]

* “You haven’t been able to do it with trademark law. You haven’t been able to do it with patent designs. We are now going to use copyright law to kill the knockoff industry. I don’t know that that’s bad. I’m just saying.” Differing opinions about the fashion industry emerged during oral arguments in the Star Athletica case. [New York Times]

* “We are all feeling a little less confident. … [T]here is an incredible amount of uncertainty that comes with this.” Some U.S. firms with offices in London and Europe are contemplating what Brexit’s effects will be on their business — or if Brexit will have any effect on their business at all. At this point, no one knows. [Philadelphia Inquirer]

How do you escape golden handcuffs?

* Quinn Emanuel sanctioned by the U.S. International Trade Commission over the Apple-Samsung case. [Law.com]

* No rest for the dissolving: Kenyon & Kenyon hit with malpractice suit. [Law360]

* Indiana’s Go Ahead And Hate Gays Religious Freedom Act invoked in child abuse defense. It’s truly a testament to how kerfunkered this whole election is that this episode isn’t going to be a devastating scandal for the Trump-Pence ticket. [Chicago Tribune]

* Former tech GC takes on housekeeping gig. [Corporate Counsel]

* Katten Muchin Rosenman; Manatt, Phelps & Phillips; and Eisner Jaffe all land stadium renaming deals, proving that there’s money to be made everywhere. Enjoy AshleyMadison.com Park! [The Am Law Daily]

* Score one for the anti-trolls: A federal judge orders a lawyer to pay $22K in legal fees after he filed multiple lawsuits over the use of his pictures. [ABA Journal]

* Palestinian Authority terrorism verdict given the heave ho by Second Circuit. [NY Times]

If these associates feel slighted, it’s understandable.

What must you know about Evan Greebel, and the case against him, to be an up-to-date guest at your next holiday cocktail hour?

A Biglaw partner was arrested this morning!